I Am Invisible

"I am invisible, understand, simply because people refuse to see me." I am only a soft whisper in the wind brushing past strangers with each blank stare piercing my confidence. The toxic air of fright is engulfing me. My past is only a brief memory to the those that are seeing me now. I am only an object for they do not know me or even care. I am only a shadow lost in the sea of people. I am invisible in a new realm with new faces and rules. This realm I fell unexpectedly into is my new reality, my new school.

This invisibility metaphor parallels with the narrator in the Invisible Man by Ralph Ellison. He was also thrown into a new world by being kicked out of his school and he had to forget about his southern roots to move on to a new adventure in finding his identity. Since I was a little child I was cursed with the plight of shyness, but it never got to this point of severity. Who knew walking in a hallway full of strangers would be such a different atmosphere.

The narrator says in the prologue, "I am not complaining, nor am I protesting either. It is sometimes advantageous to be unseen, although it is most often rather wearing on the nerves." Being invisible is often showed in a negative light but it has another nuance of meaning. I have learned now that sometimes being invisible in school can be a curse, but perhaps it is a blessing in disguise. Being invisible might sting the open wound at times, but it is how I escape from this harsh world. I might "float" in the hallways unacknowledged and as much as it is frustrating, it is not enough to mask the freeness of being a unknown. I can change myself into a different light being in a new school. I can also not involve myself in the complexities of cliques, the wrong crowd, and unnecessary harsh realities of life. No one can touch me and no one can inflict pain for I am only a passerby. I am just someone that is herself that no one knows, but in the end it does not matter. Having this shield also opens your eyes to being more observant and perceptive on people and things around you. Even the narrator finally found himself being isolated underground and he is now ready to start a new beginning.

In the prologue the narrator mentions, "I myself, after existing some twenty years, did not become alive until I discovered my invisibility." Just like him, being invisible is a part of me because it is a way I protect myself. Being invisible is sometimes frustrating, scary, and gloomy at times, but it is like gravity for me because it keeps me grounded. The hallways can be emotionally frightening, but I am safe because I am invisible.