Poem Case

My Knight in Rusty Armour

By Katelyn Chambers

Prompt: Ella Spencer, 19, is reminiscing about her high school experience and the painful events of the past year.

I'd heard all the stories about high school and about how great it was supposed to be, but all I'd learned there was how much I'd hated stereotypical teenagers and the fucking pythagorean theorem. And I realized that I hadn't made the most of my time there. And I'd hoped -I'd PRAYED -for something, ANYTHING, to give that last year of my time there meaning. And then, right when I thought I'd had enough and I was just ready to give it all up, a knight in shining armour rode in and saved the day. My knight's name was Eric Gray and he drove up in a shiny black Charger. I'd thought it was finally my chance at having the happily ever after we'd learned to believe in as children. We'd seen each other from across the school's parking lot and that's when I'd thought I'd surely fallen in love. Well, I've thought about it a lot since then and I've come to the conclusion that this whole thing could have been avoided if I had just seen the person next to him. I could have learned to love them instead. Then maybe I wouldn't be here today, and I wouldn't have had to put up with a year of pain. I know after all we'd been through it's hard to believe, but it's true. Nevertheless, throughout that entire time I loved him. I had never stopped. And I still haven't. That's what's so pathetic. Eric had hurt me so many times over that past year; emotionally, mentally, physically!! And I'd always go back to him. Well there is no more next times. That was the last time. I was so sick of it. I loved Eric, but I couldn't take being abandoned and hurt over and over again. It was an awful experience, and I understand that now. But I used to pretend that it was all I wanted. I was only lying to myself. I denied that I was vulnerable and hurting, but more importantly that I was allowing the pain to continue. And when I look at him now, and my eyes are filled with so much suffering that I can barely keep them open, he doesn't see it. Why can't he see?! Look at me! Look at me stand here and see what HE'S done to me. I'll be alright though, because I will have known that I tried. That I did everything I could have done to make him love me, and that just wasn't enough. So now I've got to rebuild what he so carelessly destroyed . It's time for me to be my own hero.

END.