Great Race to Happiness

The Great Race to Happiness

Some days I feel as though I'm trying to ice skate up a long steep hill, with no clear view of a top or any place to rest. I am healthy, determined, and hard working, but sometimes it seems that I will never get through my current struggles. I just want to find some balance and lasting happiness. I have strong faith, and I know that through honesty and dedication life will lead me in the right direction, although it seems I took a wrong turn somewhere and I have been lost in road construction for an epoch.

I have created all of my situations single handedly. I wasted a lot of time and money when I was younger on foolish, selfish activities. I remember saying quite often "I'm only going to be young once". Man, I was so right about that! I did have a lot of good times and great adventures, but I sometimes wish I would have indulged a little less, and spent a more time concerned about the future consciences. I feel I am missing out on the wonderful mature adult activities, because I am still paying for my childish young adult choices.

I believe people when they tell me it's not too late to straiten things out, and I am still young enough to bounce back. I believe I have over come many of my problems already. I have made a lot of progress in the past few years by trying to live by other people's suggestions. I sometimes get discouraged though when results aren't happening fast enough, because I have very high expectations of myself.

I often wonder how other people see their world so simply, and seem to know what to do all the time. I could be wrong by thinking that they have it easier, and they don't worry as much, or get beaten down by life occasionally too. Could my neighbors be hiding what is on their minds, and only appear to have their lives together and running smoothly? I know that I'm not alone in my struggles or my thinking, but I still wonder how I can live a little more carefree and find a secure foot hold to move forward from. No matter what, I will keep searching for solutions and I defiantly will not give up or surrender.