Ben Franklin
Essay by Paul • September 22, 2011 • Essay • 1,246 Words (5 Pages) • 1,826 Views
It all started when our star, Franklin, woke up in a vineyard. It was the tenth time it had happened. Feeling abnormally concerned, Franklin stroked a pencil, thinking it would make him feel better (but as usual, it did not). A few minutes later, he realized that his beloved rake was missing! Immediately he called his best friend, Mrs Tery. Franklin had known Mrs Tery for (plus or minus) 1.2 billion years, the majority of which were flamboyant ones. Mrs Tery was unique. She was intelligent though sometimes a little... oafish. Franklin called her anyway, for the situation was urgent.
Mrs Tery picked up to a very calm Franklin. Mrs Tery calmly assured him that most marmots grimace before mating, yet puppies usually exotically sneeze *after* mating. She had no idea what that meant; she was only concerned with distracting Franklin. Why was Mrs Tery trying to distract Franklin? Because she had snuck out from Franklin's with the rake only six days prior. It was a sassy little rake... how could she resist?
It didn't take long before Franklin got back to the subject at hand: his rake. Mrs Tery turned red. Relunctantly, Mrs Tery invited him over, assuring him they'd find the rake. Franklin grabbed his grandfather clock and disembarked immediately. After hanging up the phone, Mrs Tery realized that she was in trouble. She had to find a place to hide the rake and she had to do it skillfully. She figured that if Franklin took the Daewoo, she had take at least six minutes before Franklin would get there. But if he took the Hovercraft? Then Mrs Tery would be very screwed.
Before she could come up with any reasonable ideas, Mrs Tery was interrupted by three dimwitted kangoroos that were lured by her rake. Mrs Tery belched; 'Not again', she thought. Feeling puzzled, she aptly reached for her sock and aimlessly hit every last one of them. Apparently this was an adequate deterrent--the discouraged critters began to scurry back toward the forest, squealing with discontent. She exhaled with relief. That's when she heard the Hovercraft rolling up. It was Franklin.
----o0o----
As he pulled up, he felt a sense of urgency. He had had to make an unscheduled stop at Sears to pick up a 12-pack of oven mitts, so he knew he was running late. With a deft leap, Franklin was out of the Hovercraft and went exotically jaunting toward Mrs Tery's front door. Meanwhile inside, Mrs Tery was panicking. Not thinking, she tossed the rake into a box of mittens and then slid the box behind her coffee table. Mrs Tery was pleased but at least the rake was concealed. The doorbell rang.
'Come in,' Mrs Tery charismatically purred. With a deft push, Franklin opened the door. 'Sorry for being late, but I was being chased by some oafish zealot in a Viper,' he lied. 'It's fine,' Mrs Tery assured him. Franklin took a seat inside where Mrs Tery had hidden the rake. Mrs Tery cringed trying unsuccessfully to hide her nervousness. 'Uhh, can I get you anything?' she blurted. But Franklin was distracted. A few minutes later, Mrs Tery noticed a annoying look on Franklin's face. Franklin slowly opened his mouth to speak.
'...What's that smell?'
Mrs Tery felt a stabbing pain in her leg when Franklin asked this. In a moment of disbelief, she realized that she had hidden the rake right by her oscillating fan. 'Wh-what? I don't smell anything..!' A lie. A funny-smelling look started to form on Franklin's
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